Chapter 5: Inner Demons

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Aeris didn’t want to go home. Going home meant seeing Windor. Going home meant seeing the dragon who broke her heart. So she did everything she could to stay outside. Taking extra shifts at the Dragon’s Den or taking the long way back. When she had to go home, she stayed in her room.


What was supposed to be a few days of uncomfortable silence turned into a few weeks. She never spoke on it. No one did. They all knew her feelings on the matter, that was why everyone fell silent whenever she entered the room. Windor made a point of staying out of her way.


It wasn’t enough. Everywhere she went, she caught his scent, heard his steps or his voice if she wasn’t in the room. There were times when she had to pass him in the hall and she was forced to look at him as he stared at the floor. Every time she was reminded of the drake she once loved. The time they spent together. The life they could’ve had.


She hated it. She hated the way he looked, the way he smelled. She hated hearing his name even if it was just in passing. Most of all she hated that she agreed with Janine. Windor needed help. He always looked so pitiful and it bothered her seeing him that way.


So she was grateful he never spoke to her, that no one spoke of him in her presence. It made it easier to avoid her emotions. It was even easier when at work. Cleaning tables, delivering orders, and watching Janine kept her too busy to focus on anything else. If she worked hard enough, she was too exhausted to think while at home as well.


A hand was waved in front of her face. She cried out and stumbled backward into a table.


“You okay?” Caroline asked. “You been standing here the last ten minutes. The customers are asking about you.”


“Oh, sorry. I was just...I’m fine.” She apologized to the pair of dragons at the table she bumped and hurried to the kitchens.


Caroline followed her. “The way you’ve been acting isn’t how someone who is ‘fine’ acts. What’s going on?”


“Nothing.”


The woman stepped in front of her. “Snowflake, you’ve been working yourself hard these last few days. You need some time off.”


“What? No!” She immediately regretted the outburst upon seeing the look of concern on Caroline’s face.


Caroline looked around. They were alone except for Martin who seemed busy by the stove. “We can’t talk about this now. I’ll find you after work.”


That wasn’t a conversation Aeris looked forward to having. She didn’t want to talk about it. She didn’t want to have to relive those memories again. Not here. Here was supposed to be safe. Here was supposed to distract her from the pain.


She deposited the empty dishes in the wash bin then went back out into the dining hall. I wonder if I can make up an excuse and get Mr. Thomas to send me home early?


“Excuse me!” a female voice called.


Aeris raised her head and saw the dragon who called out to her, a silver horn-tail, waving her spiked tail in the air. Aeris wasn’t supposed to take orders, but it would be rude to ignore the dragon. As Aeris drew closer, she noticed this horn-tail’s scales had a slight green tinge to them almost as if green was her original color but it had been washed out. The dragoness also had a shorter snout than the other horn-tails Aeris had met. Aeris wondered if this dragon was part short-snout. She remembered reading that cross-bred dragons sometimes took on traits from both parents. It was considered undesirable by the human nobles.


She quickly pushed the thoughts from her mind. She was no longer the pet of a human noble. Their petty concerns, rules, and mannerisms no longer applied to her.


By the time she reached the dragoness, she had recomposed herself and said in a cheerful voice, “Hello, and welcome to the Dragon’s Den. What can I get for you?”


“Snowflake, right?”


The smile slid off her face. “I—I’m sorry?”


“Your name. It’s Snowflake, isn’t it?”


“I...Yes, I’m Snowflake. Why are you looking for me?”


The dragoness smiled. “Wanted to see my competition.”


“I’m sorry? I’m not competing for anything.”


“Wrong. You’re competing for district lord.” She scratched her side and frowned at Aeris. “Shouldn’t have bothered. You’re too weak to be a threat.”


Aeris slapped the floor with her tail. “I don’t know who you think you are, but I won’t have you speak about me that way.” The calmness of her voice and posture surprised her. She had felt this way before—like something had seized control of her and forced her scolding rant, but this was different. Instead of rage, she felt annoyance. “I did not come to work today to be insulted by a rude dragon who can’t even be bothered to give her name. Whoever informed you that I wish to become district lord is a liar. I don’t want the position and I never did. Now if you don’t mind, I’m in the middle of work so please order something, or else I will have to ask you to leave.”


She realized that it had gone quiet and noticed every dragon in the room was staring at her. She wanted to run and hide but knew the damage had already been done.


The dragoness stared for several moments before composing herself. “Call me Shai. And I take back what I said. You’re not weak, but you won’t become District Lord by hiding yourself.” She stood and walked out.


Aeris watched the dragoness leave, wondering what that was all about and the origin of the rumor. She never told anyone she trying to become anything and made no efforts to try.


She tried to push the thoughts out of her mind and get back to work, but she couldn’t focus. Who started the rumor? How widespread was it? How many dragons believed it? What other rumors were floating around? Questions upon questions that made her miss several orders, drop two meals, and accidentally refer to an older drake as “madam”. It came as a relief when Mr. Thomas approached her and told her it would be best if she went home. 


Since she couldn’t leave Janine behind, she elected to stay in the back, in a small room Mr. Thomas had reserved for employees to rest on busier days or if they spent the night. She suspected the room served another purpose since there was an underlying scent of human musk.


To pass the time, she laid in the corner and thought about how she was going to get out of her conversation with Caroline after closing time.


A scream from the other room snapped her out of her thoughts. She rushed out of the room, into the dining hall. Most of the dragons had gathered in one part of the room. Near the entrance was a pair of nightstalkers holding down a ramscale. The ramscale wasn’t showing any signs of fighting back or even concern at the two larger dragons holding it down. Not far from them stood Caroline and Mr. Thomas. Caroline sat on chair, nursing an arm that dripped blood while Mr. Thomas tied his shirt around the wound.


Aeris scanned the room for Janine. She found the young woman watching from the upper level. With a jump and flap of her wings, she hopped onto the upper level, much to the dismay of several customers who she ignored. 


“What’re you doin? You can’t--”


“Are you okay? They didn’t hurt you did they?”


“No, I was up here when Caroline got attacked.” She looked down at the crowd below. The ramscale was being dragged outside. “I don’t get it. That dragon just stood up and attacked her. She ain’t do nothin except walk by him.”


“Damn dragons can’t control themselves,” a man said behind her. Aeris took one look at the man and he immediately fell silent.


“That doesn’t make any sense," Aeris said. "Do you think she stepped on his tail?”


“I stepped on a few tails myself and dragons’re more likely to yell at you than take your head off. Maybe she knows him.”


“I’ll ask her.”


Instead of hopping over the side, she took the stairs. “Is she going to be okay?” she asked Mr. Thomas.


“As far cuts go, it isn’t very deep, which is pretty lucky considering the size of the dragon that attacked her, but she’ll be seeing a doctor all the same.”


“Hold on, Ethan. I can’t afford--”


“As my employee, your well-being is my first priority. And since you were hurt on the job, it’s only fair that I foot the bill.”


Caroline wore a sour look, but she remained quiet.  Aeris took advantage of the silence to speak up.


“That dragon, did you know who he was?”


“Nope. I never seen him before. Haven’t spoken to him either.” She shuddered a little. “That look in his eyes, it was like he wasn’t even looking at me. Like nobody was home but the lights were on.”


Another horn-tail approached them and cleared his throat. “I don’t mean to jump into your conversation but that sounds a lot like he was affected by the Matriarch’s Call.”


“Are you sure?” Aeris asked.


“Well, you usually can’t tell, but if the call is strong enough, it can completely overpower a weaker mind which usually leaves them looking...blank.”


Caroline's eyes widened. “So a matriarch ordered that wyrm to kill me?”


“Caroline, please. Unless you want to cause a panic, keep your voice down,” Mr. Thomas said.


“Do you know any matriarchs who would want to kill you?” Aeris asked.


“No. I serve dozens of dragons every day. I don’t ask if they’re matriarchs or not.”


“Actually, if a matriarch was so offended by you, she would’ve most likely killed you herself,” the horn-tail said. “This was probably an accident. A dragon was angry at you and couldn’t control her call well enough and a weak-minded drake was overpowered by it.”


Aeris tilted her head. This was the first she heard of this. “Does that happen a lot?”


“Quite a bit actually, especially when a female first awakens her call. It’s much harder to control than most let on.”


“Well, that explains a lot,” Caroline said. “Thanks for your help.”


Aeris scanned the crowd.  From her training, it was a matter of presence. A true matriarch gave off a commanding presence even if she didn’t mean to. None of the dragonesses stood out as a matriarch.


The other customers seemed to have lost their appetites. The humans and dragons were nervous about another dragon being “influenced” by a matriarch, even the ones that boasted about being too strong to fall for such things. Everyone heard the fear in their bravado. Not that Aeris blamed them. At any moment, a matriarch could control any one of them and make them do something they would always regret. It was a frightening thought.


So no one complained when Mr. Thomas announced that the restaurant was closing early. More than half of the customers had already left. Caroline didn’t stick around to clean up. Despite Mr. Thomas’s objections, she went to see a doctor by herself. “Look, if a matriarch isn’t trying to kill me then I have nothing to worry about,” she had said. Even being one person down, they got the place closed up fairly quickly.


Neither Aeris nor Janine spoke during the walk home. Aeris had mixed feelings. She didn’t want to have to explain anything to Caroline, but this wasn’t the escape she hoped for. Then there was that dragon to worry about. If the dragoness came back, it could happen again. That wasn’t a risk she liked taking.


When they entered the house, Windor was quick to greet them. “You’re back early, you said--” he stood there, staring at Aeris. She wished he wouldn’t.


“So, Windor, did anythin happen while we were gone?”


“Uh, Terran said he had something important to take care of, so he and Maxis left.”


“And they just left you alone?”


“I’m tired so I’ll be in my room,” Aeris said quickly. She pushed past Windor and hurried down the hall. No sooner had she lain on the mattress did the door open again. Without even looking back she knew who it was.


“Hey, is it okay if we talk?” Windor asked.


She tensed. So badly she wished she were talking to Caroline or Janine. She would even take Maxis with all his blunt mannerisms. 


“Aeris?”


“What?” she spat.


“I want to know if you’re okay to talk. If you’re too busy, I can--”


She sighed loudly and kept her back to the door. “Fine. Talk. I have nothing to say to you.”


“Um, okay. I...I wanted to tell you...I’m sorry. For everything. I never should’ve sent you away. I should’ve went with you. I should’ve--”


“Well you weren’t! You weren’t there and now I have to live with what I did!”


“Aeris, if I--”


With a snarl, she stood up and crossed the room. His eyes widened and his tail wrapped around his body, but he remained in place. She could tell he was bracing for an attack. She dug her claws into the floor instead.


“I don’t want to hear it! I don’t care if you’re sorry! I don’t want to listen to fake promises! It’s easy to talk about what you should have done after it’s happened!” 


“But—”


“But nothing! I trusted you! I begged you to at least take the eggs and you still sent me away! You don’t get to come back, say sorry, and think everything is going to be okay!” She slammed her body into his, forcing him into the door. “Now get out!”


Windor gave a mournful whine then left the room. She slammed the door with all the force she had, nearly catching the tip of his tail. The walls and door shuddered but held. She threw her head back and roared until her throat was sore. Then she walked around the room until she felt dizzy. Next she lay on her back and stare at the ceiling. None of it helped. She still wanted to tear down the entire building.


But knowing that would make Janine homeless, Aeris instead grabbed her flying license hanging on the hook on the wall and wrenched the door open. Flying was once her cure-all whenever she felt down. She hadn't flown since her recovery, but now she was willing to try anything.


She moved quietly down the hall to avoid alerting anyone. The last thing she wanted was for someone to try and stop her from leaving. 


Halfway down the hall, she heard voices. The door in the middle of the hall was ajar.


“I wasn’t trying to upset her,” Windor said.


She growled and walked faster.


“Saying something to her was stupid,” Maxis replied. “You really thought she’d forgive you?”


She stopped and spun around. It was surprising to hear Maxis talking to Windor. Maxis avoided talking to her or Windor whenever he could help it.


“Well, no. I don’t want forgiveness. I just want to stop her suffering.”


There was a moment of silence. She crept closer to the door, making sure to hug the wall in case someone was looking into the hall.


Maxis snorted. “She’s too busy blaming you to get over it.”


“Maxis!” Janine cried. “Where do you get off--”


“Terran and I worked for people like that. Humans not afraid of dragons because rankless dragons can’t touch them. Sending her away probably saved her life—for a while anyway.” She heard movement but couldn’t see anyone through the gap in the door.


“That doesn’t make me feel better. I could’ve gone with her. I might’ve been able to--”


“The only thing you would’ve done was caught a bullet.”


“And that would be better than living like this!”


“You would still be here, bitching about how you couldn’t protect your eggs. Or rotting in some alley.”


“Whose side are you on?” Janine asked.


“Side? They both get on my damn nerves. Nothing would've changed.”


“You don’t know that.” The way Janine’s voice quivered, Aeris could tell it was a lie. 


Aeris started backing away. This conversation brought up mixed feelings and she didn’t like it. Maxis had a point even if she hated that he said it. She knew her former master better than anyone. He would’ve found a way. But it didn’t change that Windor sent her away and thought only of himself. She could never forgive him for that even if she didn’t blame him for losing the eggs.


Just as she was turning around, she bumped into Terran. The human didn’t seem to notice her, he stared at something down the hall.


“Terran?”


He walked around her without a word. It wasn’t like him to ignore her outright like that. She tilted her head and followed him. 


“Terran, is everything okay?”


Still no response. He stopped in front of the door to Windor’s room and kicked the door open.


Everyone flinched and faced the open portal.


“Terran, what are you—!” Maxis began.


Terran raised his arm and pointed a pistol in Janine and Windor’s direction. Aeris threw her body against the human’s. The air filled with a deafening boom and the acrid smell of gunpowder. Janine screamed and covered her head. Windor shielded the young woman with his body.


Aeris used her tail to sweep Terran’s legs from under him. He fell to the floor like a doll. She jumped on top of him and pressed a claw against his throat. With her other paw, she swatted the gun from his hand. Behind her, Maxis snarled. She whirled on him and he fell silent.


She turned back to Terran who lay limp beneath her. “What do you think you’re doing?!”


Terran blinked and his eyes widened. “Aeris?  What’s going on?”


“That’s what I want to know!”


“I was just getting something to drink. Why are you attacking me?”


Aeris tilted her head. “You just shot at Janine.”


“What? No, I didn’t!”


“You did,” Maxis said.


“Why would I try to shoot her?”


“You shot at her, so you tell us,” Aeris said, pressing harder on the human’s throat.


“Aeris, let ‘im up,” Janine said.


She removed her paw slowly, just in case he tried something. He remained limp beneath her until she backed away then sat up.


“Are you okay?” he asked Janine.


Janine looked up at the newly formed bullet hole in the wall. “I’m—I’m good.”


He nodded and looked at the gun just a few feet away. “That doesn’t make any sense. I would never try to hurt her. Maxis, I was just telling you how happy I was to be able to have a good home-cooked meal!”


“I don’t care what you said before,” Aeris said. She planted herself between Janine and Terran. “You are to stay away from her.”


Janine tapped her on the shoulder. “Hold on, Aeris. Terran, you said you were in the kitchen. D’ya remember doin anythin else?”


He thought for a moment. “No, nothing. I don’t even remember walking in here. All I remember thinking is that...Windor has to die.”


“Me? I know I deserve it, but you suggested I stay here.”


“Her doing that I get,” Maxis said, pointing at Aeris. “But, Terran, what do you care?”


“I don’t care, at least not that much. No offense, you two, but I have no intention of getting in the middle of whatever’s going on between you.”


“This is all kinds of weird," Janine said. "Just today, a drake attack someone for no reason. The dragons say it might’ve been a Matriarch who can’t control her Call.”


“The Call doesn’t affect humans,” Maxis said flatly. 


“Maybe this one can.”


“Let’s hope not,” Terran said. He moved to collect his pistol, but a quick growl from Aeris made him back away. “The dragons would have a field day if a Matriarch could affect humans with her Call.”


“Then whaddya think happened? You fell asleep and stared sleepwalkin?”


“I can believe that since I haven’t been sleeping lately. I’ve been having nightmares that keep me up most nights.”


Maxis tilted his head. “You never told me that. What kind of nightmares?”


“The nightmares are nothing special. I just dream about blood and death usually. I just remember trying to hold something, but it explodes into a bloody pulp the moment I touch it.”


Aeris tilted her head. She had been having the same nightmare. In her case, the object she was touching was her eggs. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t protect them. She chose to keep it to herself. None of this made any sense to her.


“Aeris, you okay?” Janine asked.


“Yes, I’m just fine.” She avoided looking at anyone. She felt their stares. Just like before. 

 


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